Chinese Proverb
Anger could cause big problems. A problem that is small in the beginning could become bad if we handle it with anger. Not only will the situation itself get worse, our relationships with others could also deteriorate. In short, handling something with anger won’t make things better.
How to Control Anger That’s why it’s essential to control anger. By controlling anger we will be able to handle problems with calm. We can then exercise our wisdom and judgment to the problem at hand to achieve the best possible solution. Being someone who sometimes gets angry, there are some tips I find useful on dealing with anger. Here they are – choose the ones that work for you:
1. Take a deep breath
Taking a deep breath is an easy way to calm your nerves. It will be easier for you to do the other tips when your anger has subsided.
2. Drink a glass of water
It’s also an easy way to calm your nerves.
3. Take a bath
I know it is not possible in many circumstances, but if you can do it the effect is immediate.
4. Don’t speak while you are angry
If you did so you may speak harshly to others and that could be something you regret. There is a nice quote about it:
When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, a hundred.
Thomas Jefferson
5. Listen to what people say
Continuing the previous tip, not only should we not speak while we are angry, we should also learn to listen. Pay attention and try to understand the point the other person makes.
6. Take a walk
Changing your situation is a good way to overcome anger. One way to do so is by taking a walk outside.
7. Pray or meditate
Praying or meditating is an effective way to calm your nerve. It could help you regain your inner peace.
8. Listen to calming music
My favorite is instrumental music since it seems to have better calming effect but you can use whatever music that works for you.
9. Have realistic expectations
Sometimes we are angry simply because we have unrealistic expectations toward others. Make sure that your expectations are realistic. You can’t expect other people to be like you.
10. Realize that nobody is perfect
Everybody can make mistake including you. Realizing this will make it easier for you to understand when someone makes mistakes.
11. See from the other person’s perspective
One way to do that is by asking yourself: “How do I feel if I’m in his or her position?”
12. Tell a wise friend
Sometimes you just need to talk about it with a wise friend. He or she can help you see the problem in the right perspective. Just be careful to choose the right person.
13. Look at the positive side
This is a habit you should build. The habit of looking at the positive side will help you look at many situations in constructive ways.
14. Exercise
You can control anger is by directing your energy to a different direction so that it’s no longer available for anger. A good candidate is exercising.
15. Learn to forgive
If you release forgiveness you will no longer have reasons to angry to someone else. You can then focus on positive ways to solve the problem.
16. Think in long term
Often we are angry because we see too near to the future and do not think about the implications in the long term. By seeing in the long term we will be able to see the consequences of anger. There’s a quote I love about it:
When anger rises, think of the consequences.
Confucius
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How do you control anger? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments.
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