Prayer for a New Beginning

Dear Lord Jesus,
I know that I am a sinner and I need your forgiveness. I believe that You are the Son of God and that you died on the cross to pay the penalty for my sin. I believe that you rose from the dead and that you are alive today. I ask You to forgive me of my sins, of going my own way, of trying to do life without you. I ask You to come into my life and make me a new person. I turn from going my own way, and I commit my life to You as my Savior and my Lord. Please help me to grow in my relationship with you, and thank you for your grace and power to follow you. Thank you for the gift of eternal life, and thank you for the gift of your Holy Spirit, who has now come to live in me. In Jesus name, Amen.

What Are You So Busy About?

By Margie Warrell

I know you're busy. Perhaps you're even thinking to yourself, "I hope this article isn't too long because I have far too much on today to spend much time reading."

But as Henry David Thoreau said, "It is not enough to ask why you are so busy. The question is, what are you so busy about?"

Are the things which keep you running around all day giving you a deeper sense of fulfillment, happiness and peace of mind? Do they align with your values and priorities? If not, perhaps your busyness is propelling you in the wrong direction. Or, perhaps it is an excuse to distract you from facing those dissatisfying areas of your life.

You may have heard the saying, "If you climb to the top of the mountain but haven't enjoyed the journey, then it wasn't a successful climb." Are you so busy climbing to achieve your goals that you are missing out on the views along the way?

I encourage you to pause for a moment to reflect on your busyness; not only about what you are so busy doing but also how you could be doing things differently - with less effort and stress, and with more ease and fun. This will ensure you are moving toward, rather than away from, a more enriching and enjoyable life.
Shifting your busyness to being more positive and enjoyable

Being busy is fine when you feel grounded, calm and on track to accomplishing goals that are meaningful to you. Most days, I love my busy life doing work I enjoy, being a mom to my four great kids - and the list goes on. But some days I struggle to maintain calm and need to give myself "time out" to collect myself and rethink how I can move forward again without the pervading sense of urgency enveloping me. Nothing is worth forfeiting my peace of mind and ability to my life now.

My busyness and the tasks I need to accomplish are generally not the issue. Rather, it is how I choose to think about my busyness and go about my tasks that determines my daily experience (and my stress levels).

Do you sometimes find yourself complaining about how busy you are as though you had no part in the hectic schedule you've created for yourself? Or perhaps your sense of identity derives from how busy you are and you don't know how to change this.

As with everything, it is all a matter of choice. Your choice! Ultimately you decide how busy you want to be, which mountain you will climb, and you choose every day whether to enjoy the journey. But if you're so busy racing about and being all things to all people and preoccupied with 'what next?' that you aren't enjoying your life, ask yourself "What is the purpose of all this? Why am I doing all this? What is it all for anyway?"

Following are some practical suggestions for how you can be more effective in your busyness, without the stress. By applying these ideas to your life it is my intention that you will be able to savor your journey, regardless of how far you still have to climb.
Avoid Over-Committing and Learn to Say NO

Are there are commitments and responsibilities that you resent and often find yourself complaining about (either silently or openly)? There are times in our lives where we want to take on more responsibilities and get involved in more activities (a fundraising committee, sports ...). Sometimes, though, our circumstances change but we fail to adjust our commitments and wind up spreading ourselves too thin.

If in your attempt to be all things to all people you find yourself stressed out, exhausted and unable to properly meet all your commitments, ask yourself who are you really serving? When you over-commit your time and energy you are neither serving the person you are trying to help, your family (who get the tired grumpy you) nor yourself.

To learn to say no without the guilt, you must honestly assess the price you are paying in over-committing yourself.
Outsource, Delegate, Automate

What are doing that is taking up your time (and keeping you so busy) that add little or no real value? What can you outsource or delegate? What can be automated that isn't? If you have a lot on your plate that means that there are a lot of requests being made of you. If a lot of requests are being made of you, you need to start making requests of others (kids included!). Are you? You're not doing your kids any favors by not giving them responsibilities and chores.
Organize

Did you know that disorganized people spend up to 30% of their time looking for things? If you are busy but continually wasting time searching for car keys, the file you need for your next meeting, or your child's soccer shoes, then spend some time getting organized. The return on your investment in terms of time saved and stress spared will be well worth your effort.
Make Sure Others Value Your Time

Does the failure of others to keep their commitments to you add stress to your life and waste your time? Ensure people know that you expect them to honor their commitments and value your time. If someone has agreed to do something for you and hasn't fulfilled on their promise, don't ignore it. Follow up on it with them. This extends also to those people who are always turning up late for meetings and appointments, wasting your time in the process. Graciously point out that you feel they are not respecting your time, which you value very highly, and ask them to be punctual in the future.
Eliminate Energy Draining 'Tolerations'

In life you will get what you tolerate. This refers to those (often small) things you often don't do anything about because, on their own, they don't seem significant enough to bother with. Yet they all add up to undermine the quality of your day. As W. Somerset Maugham says, "It's a funny thing about life. If you refuse to accept anything but the best you often get it."

If there is things in your life that drain your energy or unnecessarily add to your busyness - an inefficient business tool, a computer that keeps freezing up, an unreliable service provider, a problematic client or even those shoes that give you blisters - don't just complain about it, do something about it!!! As a general rule in life, you will get whatever you're prepared to put up with (and then some!).

Where have you set the bar for yourself?
Give Yourself "Time Out" From Your Busyness

Martin Luther King said that he'd never have accomplished what he did if he didn't spend three hours a day in prayer. No, that was not a typo… three HOURS a day!!! At times it is important to give yourself permission NOT to be busy. Only by taking regular "down time" to nourish and center yourself to can you be really effective and efficient with your "up time".

So whatever your excuse for not taking time out for yourself - to exercise, to reflect, to plan, to read a book or soak in a bath, to get down on the floor and play with your kids, to meditate or to journal, or to pray, don't tell me it's because you are too busy. Hogwash. The laundry can wait!

What a shame it would be to reach your destination (and in record time) - to stand on the summit of that prized mountain - but to have missed out on the spectacular views along the way and all the richness your life has to offer you right now…. this day… this minute!

Really think about that... what richness could your busyness be depriving you of? Dr. Dwayne W. Dyer said, "True nobility is not about being better than anybody else, but about being better than you used to be."

I'm not suggesting you stop being busy. Just ensure you are leading a life that is rich in purposeful activity. Take time out every now and again to ensure that what you are busily engaged in is taking you where you really want to go and that in the midst of your busyness you are moving closer toward - rather than further away from - all that fills your heart and enriches your life.

Journey On!

http://www.lifetoolsforwomen.com/index.htm

Love Yourself

I’ve compiled a list on how to love yourself for readers who are facing difficulty knowing what to do in boosting their own self esteem. When I first began to be aware that I need to love myself first, before I can develop any meaningful relationships with others, I realised that I did not know where to start.

This was a surprise to me then as I would have thought I’d be an expert on love and relationships by then. After all, as I recalled, in my younger days, I’ve spent much time looking for the best spouse or romantic partner. But I soon realised that my search was meant to fill the void or emptiness I had inside. Finding a good relationship with myself seemed to be an even harder task! However, as things turned out, I realised that I failed miserably in my early relationships because I had insufficient or little self love.

If you’ve suffered from low self esteem, then it goes to show that you are lacking in self love. You may even find it difficult to even search your heart for that little bit of love you have for yourself. I dare say that your mind has been so ingrained with self sabotaging thoughts for the longest time, that loving yourself sounds unnatural to you.

However, nothing is going to happen if you do not make a conscious decision. And that includes Attracting Abundance. When you don’t love yourself, you are basically telling the Universe that you are unworthy or undeserving of any love or positive outcomes that have the same vibrational match as love.

Learning to love yourself starts with making a conscious decision, an intention to become happy and lead a fulfilled life. When you do not love yourself and suffer from low self esteem, you can find that it impossible to ever reach the potential that you suspect you have.

“Love yourself first and everything falls into line.”
Lucille Ball quotes (American radio and motion-picture actress and comedy star, 1911-1989)

When you make a decision to love yourself, you are really saying that you want to come alive. You accept that you are responsible for the outcomes that you experience in your life and would like yourself to shine from living a fulfilling life.

So if you’ve decided on loving yourself but are as equally stumped on how to love yourself, as I was back then, here are 17 ways which I believe can be helpful:

1. Fall in love with yourself. Think about what makes you You. Just like a flower that needs watering to grow, learn to nurture yourself in every way. Love yourself for all the good that you see and accept your flaws and the fact that you are imperfect. This does not meant that you do not learn to change from your shortcomings; instead, you are being gentle and kind to yourself for all your flaws. Look in the mirror and fall in love with the reflection that is You.

“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.”
Oscar Wilde quotes (Irish Poet, Novelist, Dramatist and Critic, 1854-1900)

2. Eliminate Self Criticism. Do you often berate yourself over the tiniest thing? Is there a little voice inside your head that often tells you that you are no good because you are stupid or make mistakes. If you find that you criticise yourself often, make an effort to stop the self criticism.

“I CAN is 100 times more important than IQ.” — unknown

3. Be Kind And Positive. When you start to think kindly and positively about yourself, the love you have for yourself just grows. Make it a habit to praise yourself everyday, while in the front of the mirror. Because of such thoughts, you naturally undertake empowering actions that support your development.

4. Acknowledge Your Effort. It’s not always about winning or having success in everything that you do. Many times, it is the effort that counts! Acknowledge that you’ve done your best, even if you have failed to produce tangible results.

5. Let Go Of Worry. Loving yourself requires you to let go of your worry. It is a horrible way to live a life filled with constant worrying. I can attest to that! Worry does not help in any way. It cannot, on its own, make things happen. Only wise actions can! So instead of worrying, spend time thinking about what you can do to help in the situation. If the situation is beyond your control, then ask the Universe for your desired outcome and let things work out on their own. Things will come to be, if they are meant to be.

“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.” — Epictetus quotes (Greek philosopher associated with the Stoics, AD 55-c.135)

6. Trust Yourself. Have confidence in your abilities. Know that you have the ability to make important changes for yourself, for as long as you put your heart to it. You can also support yourself by visualizing desired outcomes.

“Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.”
Benjamin Spock quotes (American Pediatrician and Author, 1903-1998)

7. Forgive Yourself. If you have made mistakes in the past that had caused you to feel less worthy, then you need to forgive yourself. All of us make mistakes; so there really is no need to beat yourself up over them. Or if you’ve been carrying around a baggage of emotional hurt because of a childhood trauma, learn to forgive yourself that it is not your fault.

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”
Lewis B. Smedes quotes

8. Be Truthful To Yourself. Loving yourself requires you to be truthful about your own feelings. If you are happy, acknowledge the joy. If you are sad, acknowledge the sorrow. When you are truthful about your feelings, you do not try to lie to yourself or seek to bury your negative emotions. Instead, acknowledging what you feel provides a good guide to what your thoughts are. And as we all know, thoughts can be changed, so that healing and self growth can take place.

9. Grow Spiritually. When you spend time growing spiritually, loving yourself is an automatic thing. You become more peaceful, connected, kind, loving and compassionate. You nurture a mind that grows more beautiful by the day. How to not love yourself in the process?

10. Make Positive Affirmations Everyday. Post affirmations that can help raise your self esteem everyday. For instance, say this to yourself “I love and accept myself completely and unconditionally.” Read your affirmations out loud several times a day.

11. Express Gratitude. Express gratitude for the person that you are. For instance, cultivate an appreciation for your strengths and gifts. Also, feel a sense of gratitude that you are alive and well, and fully capable of making a difference in your life.

12. Nurture Your Dreams. Why deny yourself your dreams? When you nurture your dreams, you would love the life that you are leading. Every moment that you live is a joy because you are expressing yourself fully.

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. —Mark Twain

13. Boost Your Self Confidence. Make a deliberate attempt to look for opportunities that can help improve your sense of Self. For instance, if you are particularly good at doing something, set aside more time to indulge and improve your skills on it. Knowing that you have particular gifts can boost your self esteem.

14. Relax. You need to give yourself space to take breaks every now and then. If you spend your time working, without paying attention to your health, it also means that you do not love yourself well enough to take care of your own body. Fill your time with silence, soothing music and visions of beauty; anything that nourishes your Soul.

15. Have Fun. Inject some fun into your life. Life is meant to be an enjoyable. Don’t take life or yourself too seriously. If you can think of life in this manner, you automatically relax and quit worrying over things that do not matter.

16. Look After Your Body. It is important that you strengthen yourself with proper nutrition and regular exercise. Your body is a temple and you should treat it with respect, love and care. It has been found that the lack of self love is often the root causes of conditions like eating disorders, obesity or even terminal diseases.

“Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.”
Jim Rohn quotes (American Speaker and Author. He is famous for motivational audio programs for Business and Life. )

17. Learn To See Beauty. When you learn to see beauty in every thing, you will also see beauty in yourself. Hence, stop to smell the flowers. Notice everything. Feel everything. The pink blush of the flowers in your garden, the greeness of the plains, the whisper of the gentle wind, or the myraid hues of an evening sky.

Here is a good affirmation to read and reflect on…..


“I am Me. In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. Everything that comes out of me is authentically mine, because I alone chose it — I own everything about me: my body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions, whether they be to others or myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. I own my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes.

Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me. By so doing, I can love me and be friendly with all my parts. I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know — but as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles and ways to find out more about me.

However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically me. If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought, and felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that which I discarded. I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me.

I own me, and therefore, I can engineer me. I am me, and I am Okay.”

My New Year`s Resolution! 2010

Okay, I know it can be hard to come up with worthy resolutions for the new year, so I thought I’d give you a bit of help. Remember, goals & resolutions are totally different. Goals can be defined as “what by when“, while a resolution is somewhat more ephemeral. A resolution is light-hearted, something you do for fun. A guideline, rather than a hard-&-fast line. Here are some ideas, but if you already know what your resolutions are, feel free to post them in the comments below! I’d love to hear them.

Mine here...^o^
* Lose weight
* Get out of debt
* Become more organized (spcl laundry aww)
* Maintain a diary
* Save money (posible 500 or 1000 yen everyday ^0^)
* Pray everytime, go to church weekly
* Get a better job
* Start yoga or meditation
* Beautiful everyday, things make every day beautiful
* Make 3 new friends or more ^0^
* Go outside with kids and talk to neighbors
* Less computer
* Reduce stress
* Take a trip
* Volunteer to help others
* Be less grumpy (anger)
* Choose a role model & then think, “What Would ____ Do?”
* Learn something new (such as a foreign language, music or names of flowers)
* Try to get up early in the morning
* Time management
* Help the poor
* Do it interior creative everyday

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New Year's parenting resolutions

This time of year, we parents reflect on everything we have — and all the ways we could do better by our kids. After all, who among us hasn't vowed to lose our temper less and show our kids we love them more?

Parents have told us that, among other resolutions for the new year, you'd like to:

• Not yell so much

• Stop using threats to keep your kindergartner or grade-schooler in line

• Be more loving — and find other ways to help your 5-year-old or 6- to 8-year-old feel good about himself

• Slow down and really listen to your child

• Give each of your children the one-on-one time he deserves

• Find more family time

• Plan fun outings more often

• Read more with your child — whether he's a beginning, intermediate, or advanced reader

• Watch less TV

• Make healthier meals

• Encourage your child's relationship with grandparents

• Share your beliefs with your child and — if religion or spirituality is important to your family — make them part of your family life, traditions, and rituals

• Nurture yourself so that you can better nurture your child.

How to Control Anger: 16 Simple Tips on Dealing with Anger

If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.
Chinese Proverb

Anger could cause big problems. A problem that is small in the beginning could become bad if we handle it with anger. Not only will the situation itself get worse, our relationships with others could also deteriorate. In short, handling something with anger won’t make things better.



How to Control Anger That’s why it’s essential to control anger. By controlling anger we will be able to handle problems with calm. We can then exercise our wisdom and judgment to the problem at hand to achieve the best possible solution. Being someone who sometimes gets angry, there are some tips I find useful on dealing with anger. Here they are – choose the ones that work for you:

1. Take a deep breath

Taking a deep breath is an easy way to calm your nerves. It will be easier for you to do the other tips when your anger has subsided.

2. Drink a glass of water

It’s also an easy way to calm your nerves.

3. Take a bath

I know it is not possible in many circumstances, but if you can do it the effect is immediate.

4. Don’t speak while you are angry

If you did so you may speak harshly to others and that could be something you regret. There is a nice quote about it:

When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, a hundred.
Thomas Jefferson

5. Listen to what people say

Continuing the previous tip, not only should we not speak while we are angry, we should also learn to listen. Pay attention and try to understand the point the other person makes.

6. Take a walk

Changing your situation is a good way to overcome anger. One way to do so is by taking a walk outside.

7. Pray or meditate

Praying or meditating is an effective way to calm your nerve. It could help you regain your inner peace.

8. Listen to calming music

My favorite is instrumental music since it seems to have better calming effect but you can use whatever music that works for you.

9. Have realistic expectations

Sometimes we are angry simply because we have unrealistic expectations toward others. Make sure that your expectations are realistic. You can’t expect other people to be like you.

10. Realize that nobody is perfect

Everybody can make mistake including you. Realizing this will make it easier for you to understand when someone makes mistakes.

11. See from the other person’s perspective

One way to do that is by asking yourself: “How do I feel if I’m in his or her position?”

12. Tell a wise friend

Sometimes you just need to talk about it with a wise friend. He or she can help you see the problem in the right perspective. Just be careful to choose the right person.

13. Look at the positive side

This is a habit you should build. The habit of looking at the positive side will help you look at many situations in constructive ways.

14. Exercise

You can control anger is by directing your energy to a different direction so that it’s no longer available for anger. A good candidate is exercising.

15. Learn to forgive

If you release forgiveness you will no longer have reasons to angry to someone else. You can then focus on positive ways to solve the problem.

16. Think in long term

Often we are angry because we see too near to the future and do not think about the implications in the long term. By seeing in the long term we will be able to see the consequences of anger. There’s a quote I love about it:

When anger rises, think of the consequences.
Confucius

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How do you control anger? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments.